Curls and Cocktails aka why natural hair meetups are “crucial” for selfcare 

You know how sometimes we get told about a must-see movie or taste-it-now pudding or one-day-only sale and immediately we feel like, ooo I’m gotta try that. So we make a mental note to do just that, right?

Right.

And then life happens and we get distracted and then we forget about that promised thing?

Right (stay with me).

And then that limited-time-only thing disappears and the opportunity is gone…

Then after the fact, we’re like “jare but I really was going to go/eat/do to that! Now I feel versin.”

Those were my exact feelings around the very first Curls and Cocktails event hosted by Cape Town Naturally back in 2016. It looked like such a vibe and I kicked myself for not being there.

Anyway that kak feeling of fomo (fear of missing out) made me vow to myself I wouldn’t miss the next one. Come hell or high water I’d be there.

Of course, just as luck would have it, the tickets were on sale while I was broke (FYI, Januworry is junk and the price of school stationery is from the devil)… and then when my payday eventually came around… the tickets were (yes, you guessed it) completely sold out.

By now my plak was completely gesak. I thought I’m not meant to go.

So God decided to intervene. (Or as Beyonce sings: If Jesus says yes, nobody can say no…)

After I had given up all hope … I got a whatsapp from fellow radio producer friend of mine, Kaylee Kruser telling me that she is going and asking me if I want to go with her…

(Seriously though, how perfect is that?)

I nearly lost my mind in excitement. I was finally going!

Two weeks later Shana Genever (writer and creator of ‘Just a Hoe with Babies’ and Into a Housewife) tells me she is going too.

Are the stars aligning? Why is everything falling into place… (so naturally)…

Saturday 25 March finally comes and I’m off to the Toad and Josephine in Newlands.

What I didn’t know was how “home”, safe and loved I would feel amongst these naturalistas.

I finally met plus-size model and businesswoman Justene Hillary Josias (someone I’d been stalking on Instagram for a very long time) and my admiration for her only grew further.

IMG_20170325_204750.jpg

She told us her hair story (making it so relatable through memes) and towards the end of her chat she said: “If you have a goal or dream go for it… It just might open the door to your greatness,” I swear it was like she was talking directly to me that I need to fulfill this goal I have. It couldn’t come at a better time.

This was followed by a chat by 7de laan actress Kay Smith (she played Tarryn, Errol’s love interest in the soapie) who spoke of a very important aspect on our natural hair journeys.

Image may contain: 4 people, people smiling

She reminded us that, your voice is the only voice you should be listening to when it comes to how you wear or style or express your hair – so if you decide to cut all your hair on the morning of a natural hair event (like she did) then do so. So what? Its just hair! This is YOUR journey! “Have a mantra every morning that you are more than enough. If you hair is kroeser than kroes, it’s your kroes – own it!”

I know right? Preach!

But wait there’s more…

My clear highlight of the whole evening was meeting up with a distant relative, Nadine. I won’t get into the details of how we’re related, but finally meeting and seeing my cousin – who is ALSO a natural – there is no greater joy! Don’t believe me? See these pics:

Image may contain: 2 people

Image may contain: 2 people, closeup

Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling

All in all, Curls and Cocktails was a full night of constant encouragement and natural hair appreciation that filled my emotional tank to the brim. When we need self-care, as naturals in a society that doesn’t always see our value and beauty … an event or “meeting of minds” like this can be the perfect antidote. A bos-kop boost 🙂

IMG-20170404-WA0011

Thank you to Cape Town Naturally  for hosting such a wonderful event

Image may contain: 7 people, people smiling, people standing

I look forward to more and hope to see there

Keep it real

A

 

 

 

Coiled up/ Back to my roots/ Why I cut all my hair off

This is the post excerpt.

My natural hair journey started nearly five years ago with a number 1 haircut (big chop), lots of faux courage and too much self doubt. I was just as scared as you may be feeling/ felt right now.

In fact, if I look back…I wasn’t really ready for the gravity and ramifications of this massive hair decision.  It didn’t think this through like I usually do.

All I knew was that I needed authenticity.

So I cut all my hair off.

And then all my childhood fears came rushing to the fore…

I’d made a promise to myself to document this journey… but when I saw how “raw”, “coarse” and unnerving (in other words…how “kroes”) my hair was I changed my mind. My confidence was at an all time low. At the time I kept thinking, there is no way in hell I’m going to share  my most vulnerable part of myself to others.

And this blog was put on hold.

To be honest – I think the reason why I didn’t start (or want to start) writing about my hair was because I scared. Fear stops us from so much.

I was grappling with so many emotions back then: Regret, anxiety, fear. And I thought (at that time) that opening myself up to others would of compound those emotions.

It seemed too much and so I backed out. (Now I see what an excuse that is).

Instead I privately took time to build myself up and chisel away years of self-hate. I read, researched and unlearned a lot.

As my hair flourished, my confidence grew and I started reconsidering this blog.

Fast forward to today and now I think I’m ready.

Welcome to my hair journey…

A